20090218
headache/overheat



Extraverted Feeling, your reins are in place but they're not tugging hard enough. This madness which prevails and overwhelms whenever the rolling stone sets in its momentum, always surmounts to something inevitably huge and dark, and starts to exude an aura of evil and malice, engulfing travelers around and striking fear and paranoia into the hearts of the maidenstepped.

I recognise that this curse is not but a part of a phase, but a curse, a vile imp which has been locomoting behind the scenes, and driving me to perform such acts of panic and scorn, and I need something more than myself to hold it at bay. This thorn in my flesh, when will it go away?

Its either one or the other, and if I try to hold them both together, nothing good will amount, and all will fall to pieces. I've been too caught up with other things, and only now do I realise how far I've strayed from the main.

Am I truly by myself? I am starting to think so.

I still am not willing to surrender this part of me to successfully integrate into the rest of the world, to be able to live and co-exist. I do not want to lose my individuality, my will, my opinion. Then i guess this burden I undertake will bear a hefty cost.

The way is narrow, and the choices are limited, but for my consciousness to remain existent, I will walk on.


 Tianyong
20 years old.
The time will come soon.